Addressing Self Harm Misconceptions

December 29, 2016
Hiya everyone,

It’s very likely you know someone who has experienced self harm. It’s scary to think 1 in 12 teens self harm: that is almost 2 teens in every class room. You may not have realised the statistics were that high but, yes they unfortunately are....

Today I wanted to address everything surrounding self-harm, seeing as I myself self-harm, well I'm recovering from self harm after self harming for 2 years on and off.

In this post I share coping strategies for someone who self harms and some facts that some may not have realised.

There is a TRIGGER WARNING throughout as their is talk of self harm throughout this post. If this could be triggering for you I STRONGLY ADVISE you to click away now, BUT here is a page of some helpful posts for ways to cope/ cheer up your mood.

The stereotypical image of someone who self-harms has always been the same, a teenager, crying while cutting their wrist with a razor blade. BUT this isn't the case boys self harm and so do adults and cutting isn't the only form of self harm.

I hope the ten points below are relatable to some / all of you who read this and it helps you see self harm in a different way.

1/ More people than you’d think self-harm.

2/ A lot of people are, but not all people who self-harm are depressed.

3/ Self-harm isn’t always an addiction. Sometimes it just helps people get through a hard time, but then once they’re okay again, they stop.

4/ It is far from “cool” or “trendy” or "aesthetic" no matter what the media can perceive it to be. It’s a cry for help, well in some but not all cases as for many they cover the areas they self harm  practically 24/7 no matter if it's just scars.. Don’t romanticize self harm!

5/ There is nothing more embarrassing  / awkward than when someone asks what happened when they see your scars.

6/ People usually feel closer to someone when they see their scars.

7/ Self-harming isn’t just cutting. It’s also burning, biting, scratching, punching and head banging (this is just a few that I have mentioned).

8/ There’s a feeling of attachments to (this is someone who has self harmed) scars that you will probably never truly understand and probably no one else will understand.

9/ Deep inside you don’t want to admit that something is wrong, so getting help becomes incredibly hard. You just want to pretend you’re normal and that everything’s totally fine.

10/ The none stop paranoia that someone will see your scars and then start ranting at you about how it's not "pretty".

Some things people have said to me that have helped me realise I shouldn't self harm are: “you deserve to treat yourself better” “scars aren’t pretty” “others can hurt you so you don’t need to hurt yourself”. Don't get me wrong, at first I didn't except it was bad, nor pretty to self harm and it's only 2 years down the line I do.

If you are struggling with self-harm or any other kind of mental illness, please go and seek help. It doesn’t even need to be a specialist, just try and find someone you trust and talk to them about it. Teachers, friends and family are the best bet but there are so many people who could help you if you just let them in (note about teachers, they are humans too, and I’m positive they will try and help the best they can. Many have been trained to deal with child protection and so know self harm happens and why it happens BUT they will most likely have to tell parents but that could be easier than you telling your parents).

Just know that you are strong, and I believe in you and so do many others, know you are not alone and you are very loved no matter if you feel your not.

Finally, I want to end this with two coping mechanism I have found work very well for people (including me). If ever you have an urge to self-harm, draw on your forearm (or anywhere else on your body you self harmed) with a felt-tip pen or even a gel pen works great. The skin on the forearm is soft enough for almost all pens  to show up on and using a marker. A doodle, squiggle, would work great, so would quotes and sayings. Tattoos, not real ones but temporary ones. This has been wonderful for me due my self harm recovery and I'm gonna keep on doing it.

Would mean a lot if you shared this post on social media to raise awareness of self harm seeing as it is mental health awareness week. You  can share the post at the bottom of the post under where it says posted by Becca Slade.

Keep fighting beautiful,
Becca x

This is a short biography of the post author and you can replace it with your own biography.


  1. This must have taken a lot of courage to write, i know just how hard it is - i hope your recovery goes well, all my love x

    1. Sorry for late reply! It was a very hard post to write but people need to be aware of it and thank you so much!

  2. I LOVE YOU SO SO MUCH!!!❤ #9 is so me but I'm slowly trying to talk about it. I'm so proud of you and you're just amazing and beautiful inside and out. ❤

    1. THANK YOU Enigma, means so much! You keep fighting and you will over come it one day, just like i will and so many others! Always here for a chat
      Becca xxx

    2. We're here for each other and that's what counts❤ we'll definitely make it through

  3. What an incredible post; I am so proud of you, Becca! I am thankful to be a part of your life and see you working hard to help yourself as well as others by sharing your experience. Love always, Nat


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